Skimpy Scrawlings

is "Fingal the Llama's stripey beret".
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Two old friends about to embark on new journies (not together, like). A very significant weekend awaits us. My love you and yours, Kerry and Lisa.

Will speak more of this very soon.

X

So I disappeared for a while. Mam’s birthday, although geographically only a few inches away, is actually months ago now. It was Kathy Bates. She’s had me holed up in her shed in Penge and threatened to Chinese-burn my ankles if I didn’t carry on writing chapters of “Mr McJumper’s Jam Factory”. I had originally killed off a character that was close to her heart and she took severe umbrage. Not really sure why. He was a minor character called Funt who spent most of his time hanging round the bins dressed as Louis Pasteur. Anyway, she seemed to think that, “the book’s plot progression is intrinsically hinged on Funt’s disengaged refuse-orientated activities”. I couldn’t see this link personally and so escaped by sneaking out, bit by bit, through my own nose while she wasn’t looking.

Also I am forced to answer the withering comment left by my esteemed blogging compatriot, Kevin Chicken Feet III regarding an the meeting of my sister Joanne and web usability stud, Jakob "The Fonz" Nielsen. He is in no way overrated and I would go as far as saying that he is the sole reason must of us haven't all had our eyes poked out by bad internets. Anyway, our lass ensured that future generations will surf in safety by laying a big fat hug on the man himself, imbuing him with such an enormous sense well-being that he vowed a new and holy crusade. Amazing guy. Amazing chops.

And while I am at it, Mr Kevin's mother, Philip, hypnotised me into bidding for a three-foot high brown gorilla at a local auction. I went in there with specific instruction not to go anywher near it but after a seemingly innocent discussion with Mrs O'Mall, I felt a strange yearning rising in me. My fate was sealed. She is by day a salve for the tortured mind, a cooling balm for stricken soul as she pursues her angelic vocation, unselfishly giving of her time and sweat so that others may traverse the assault course of life with a hand at their shoulder. At the weekend she makes you buy monkies.

Keep safe amigos X